Good morning, Monsters,

I’ve gotten a lot of questions about Kanji.

Like,
What is a Kanji?
Can I smoke Kanji?
Is Kanji a facial cream?
Is Kanji in the room with us now?

But never WHY Kanji?

Yo momma is why.

Sorry that was childish. (tho correct.)

No, seriously, one of the muses on ApocaBitch Roadshow was teleported to this place, spent a lifetime as a man rediscovering his ultimate form - you know that old story.

Anyway, fast forward to a troll in the Dungeon (one Gurgin, a self-styled “boommancer”) who makes a faustian-type dealio with the Boomfather (actual-styled Boomagog) and thanks to the quantum shit that happens when you play different stories with the same dice…bingo bango, it’s yo momma. Or rather, we found a rather large hole made in the space-time of level 6 and on the other side? Kanji. Big, gorgeous, luscious, hottest thing you ever met. Even Robert E. Howard would’ve wrestled this map to find Legion’s Peak!

Ok, so maybe I’m hot for Kanji.

I like new stuff though. Serpent women tribes and cat-riding tribes? Sure that’s pretty cool now…but pff. It’s hard being this cool man. Don’t be this cool kids.

There, a tale of fire and ice for your tuesday morning.

Come, join Tailblazer Jones and the crew as we plumb the depths of this crazy cursed land. And maybe…along the way we’ll discover what really matters…(see above)

Viva La Dungeon!
Lich

If this is your first time back to reading the Dungeon Bump and are confused by the new format please see this article.

The Viva Battle-Royale Adventure Game Show

One of the experiments with the Game Show has been a set of Characters we’ve followed through three seasons of Viva. These seasons comprised a three act story for each of those characters.

This is the final season with these characters.
Their arcs conclude now.

Dr. Dio | The Delver | Tailblazer Jones

We have crossed a long hallway of characters to find an absolute treasure at the other end.

It would be a shame if I didn’t point out the same could be said of this particular characters journey.

See Dr. Dio really got into Gynecology for the wrong reasons.

I mean, I get it, the allure to study vagina magic is real, but maybe he should’ve dated a little more in college. This is not a dig! This man would admit to it. He figured it out pretty quickly once he started his practice. Not a lot of magic in the maintenance of anything really, the maintenance IS the magic…but well he sought magic elsewhere and found himself in the Dungeon. Better for everybody, he’s said.

In the Dungeon, the Doctor found himself surrounded by an environment so different it was intoxicating. His loneliness was burned off like sweat by curiosity as he explored the mushroom marsh and swamps of level five. When he ate a mushroom and suddenly could sense treasure and even open chests with his mind? Yea, he was hooked. Not on mushrooms, on all the secrets and paths, nooks and crannies the level offered.

Does the spoon hold enough Irony yet? Let us add a titch more.

Upon entering Season 14, Dr. Dio OBGYN, took the name The Delver.

If you’re wondering, it was a self-aware choice.

In the steampunk bomb-filled halls of level 6, the Delver sought clues to a treasure he had heard whispered of on level 5. A treasure I have to admit I’m a little embarrassed to have lost. See, long story short someone had stolen my Bronze Baby Spoon (magic of course.) and they were holding it on level 6.

Well, this guy here, took a minute out of his busy schedule staying alive in Viva La Dungeon to stage a heist and steal it back, all right from under the nose of this thief!

I thought, we’ve got ourselves a hardcore treasure hunter here.

But the Doctor gave us a different perspective when he returned for his final season.

The Delver was funny he thought. He liked exploring the caves and dark secret places. But what he thought was funny was just grease for the slide. His embodiment took over almost immediately and he found that not only did he love to explore, he was born to do it. Over and over, in and out of the caves and secret places for like hours. Oh and find legendary artifacts. That’s the goal. You’ve got to have a goal.

No, now, the world would know him as Tailblazer Jones.

You can think about that name, and whether you like it or not, while he’s exploring your caves and finding your legendary loot.

This belongs … in my backpack, baby.

Viva La Tailblazer Jones!

Hope to see you tonight at 9pm EST on Twitch.tv/theLichingHour for some Viva!